Peeing

I had another doctors appointment yesterday (different doctor, not creepy B from physician's office). This doctor's office was in the same building as a dialysis clinic. I left work early, but I ended up being an hour and a half early. I just so happened to be wearing extremely painful shoes that day, and I also had to pee---badly. I had a dilemma: do I sit there for about an hour and wait to go pee OR do I go in, find the bathroom, and sit around the doctor's for an hour and half OR do I go in, pee, and come back out? The third option is the most optimal for obvious reasons, but my shoes hurt sooo much that it was NOT the decision I wanted.

I ended up trying to pee in my Snapple jar in my car. I pulled down my pants (not enough for the world to see my janx, but just enough so I could manuver it), and tried peeing in it. I then couldn't remember what hole girls pee out of and got nervous and pulled my pants up and sat back down. Failure number 1. I waited a good 5 minutes, but the suffering was wayyy too much, so I attemped this feat once again. Same thing. Couldn't remember which hole, feared the worst (drippage, wet pants, wet seat, pee everywhere essentially), and gave up. Failure number 2.

Remember, I was in front of a dialysis clinic?

Yes. I failed to pee TWICE in front of a dialysis clinic.

I felt so bad about my failures, I ran inside (so utterly mind blowingly painful for my poor feet), found the bathroom and peed. It was one of those utterly mind blowing pees that ended up making up for my shoes/feet. I walked out of there feeling like 100 bucks. Take that dialysis clinic.