TCB

TCB ended up texting me. I have to say I pretty much felt like the biggest b*tch in the world upon reading his texts, as he actually did NOT have his phone at Shamrock Fest, AND he did was NOT aware his brother's phone called people with an unknown number. I mean, come on though, 1+1= 2, "not having your phone" + unknown number = rejection. I know my math... but apparently I was wrong.

He was quite possibly the most entertaining texter I have ever stumbled upon. His first text was a  novel explaining, in the most witty/charming way, about why he didn't call or text on Sunday (Shamrock Fest was on a Saturday, he told me he would text or call the next day, I didn't get one, Monday he sent me the novel). He had just gotten his phone back from his little brother, la dee da, he said he started a dance party after he left (+1 point), was sad he had to leave my side (+1), etc.... The texts are just a big blur of fun, lust, and sexting. Ok, no. I told him I don't sext on the first text, so he'd need to wait for that as I am a "lady".

This goes on for like one whole day (Monday). Funny, charming, witty texts. Remember-- I don't know his name. Fancy that. He at one point mentions how "I am as sharp as a razors-edge". I stopped in my tracks. I was scrambling in  my head "Does he know my last name?" "Is this a joke?" "Is this a coincidence he used the 'razors-edge' simile?"

I was contemplating ways of asking him if he knew my last name, WITHOUT him asking if I knew his name. Welllllll I just ended up asking him. "Do you know my name?" And he said something along the lines of "Sara (h). I don't know if it's with an H or not, and I don't know your last name, as I had to leave before I got that out of you" So I told him why I asked, I told him my last name. I was just WAITING for him to Facebook friend me, as we all know he jumped right on and found me. I called him out on it too, since it took awhile for him to text me back, "Are you stalking me now?" and he said yes and how he wouldn't friend me unless I would accept it. Um? Like I wouldn't?

Alas, no friend request came. Instead he asked if I wanted to go out on Tuesday or Wednesday. He told me he had a wedding in Florida from Thursday until Monday, so he wanted to "See me before I leave, so I can keep your attention" OoOo. Nice play TCB. We decided we'd meet on Wednesday (Dr. appt on Tuesday) and he had to leave on Thursday.

Wednesday just happened to be Saint Patrick's Day. Who would have thought that both times I meet TCB it involved leprechauns and an abundance of alcohol? Who knew.

I still didn't know his name.

So I go to work (I overslept, did my hair in the bathroom at work, wore a green dress, got a lot of compliments), am nervous, but mostly just nervous because I didn't know what the hell TCB looked like, or even his name. Not even the sound of his voice. I knew he went to Tech, played lacrosse, and had brothers. Cool.

We flirted a little throughout the day. There was some radio silence until about 4pm when I texted him (we were to meet around 5pm), and asked if he was a serial killer. I mean, I had to know right? He said he hadn't been caught yet. Ha ha. Funny.

5 o'clock rolls around. I told him I couldn't leave for another 10 minutes. "Ill call you in 12 then" he said. 12 minutes go by. No call. He called like two minutes after the 12, which I guess isn't that bad.... I told him the parking was going to be horrendous as it was A. Old Town Alexandria, B. Old Town Alexandria on St Patrick's Day. Bars already had lines.

Don't worry he said. I have connections. Meet me at Rocket Grill.

MMMkkkk I start walking, but I stopped in Banana Republic to find this jacket I really liked (I had a 40% coupon for that day ONLY). Didn't like it, kept walking. It was hot that day, so I was sweating (of course, typical Sarah).

He calls "Did I beat you here?" "Yes maybe" I sassed him. He sassed me. We are sassy.

I see him. I get nervous. We hug. He takes me into this wine tasting shop. His friend is the manager. He introduces me. I STILL don't know his name.

We drink a few little glasses of wine, we get tipsy. He is tall. He is cute. He is a boy. TCB.

We start talking about some things and he mentioned he just "got his phone back in January" and I was thought so many things "Where was he?? JAIL!?? Maybe he went to Haiti... Maybe he went to a deaf camp where they don't need phones..." I don't know. So I asked him.

He whips out his passport.

YES VICTORY --- I KNOW HIS NAME HIS SOCIAL HIS DOB HIS BIRTH LOCATION WHERE THE PASSPORT WAS ISSUED WHAT HE LOOKED LIKE AT 16.

MUAHAHAHAHA.

"After Tech, I decided to travel. I was Pre-Med (are you serious right now??), majoring in Bio. I had a friend who told me he traveled around Europe and taught English, it sounded interesting, so I signed up to have fun before medical school. I am fluent in Czech and I understand French and Spanish. I just got back in November, and will be going to Europe again in June. I just got a phone in January."

Double U Tee Eff

Umm... Cool? What do you say to something like that? I mean I guess I have an amazingly cool job. I help kids, but I have never been to Europe, I majored in Communication, and I live at home. Welcome to the good life.

We stay at this wine place for a bit, and I got to know the manager friend who educated me on wine and tearing up/putting back together cars (random some people's passions right?). TCB was supposed to pick up his brother after his class at 9:30... not going to happen.

We go out back, they do something that I don't do (not against, but I don't do it) and get a little bit red eyed. And the three of us chit chat. I don't know what we talked about, but I guess it wasn't that interesting.

TCB (I could tell you his name, but I don't think it's as remarkable as TCB) and I decided to go to the Fish Market down on King Street to continue our St. Patrick's Day crawl. He told me on the way there how he went to a local high school, and how one of his family friend's owns the Fish Market and how he helped to build it. Damn, I thought, he is going to know everyone.

He did.

We get there, and low and behold there is the brother I met on Saturday (he was very tall, and very cute, I will call him VTCB). With VTCB are like 5 of his friends from high school. This was a prelude to the bar. We talked with them, I got cold, he took me inside. We didn't need to show the bouncer our ID's. He knew the bouncer. We walked in and he knew the bartender. We walk to the other side. He knew, no joke, every single person we passed. Um?? There is no such bar like this for me and I certainly would avoid it at all cost... I like my anonymity. I thought I was in Cheers, "where everyone knows your name". Dayyammmn son, how you know all deez people?!

We order what the Fish Market calls a "schooner"--- basically a huge goblet of beer. I got the baby one (maybe one or two beers) and he got the mama one (4-6 beers, ridic).

Hot damn it was huge (that's what I said, and yes, I am a she, so that's what she said).

Did I mention he knew everyone? He knew the girls, the guys, the tallest man I haver ever seen, who was the bartender, the old men around us. Then there was me. Wallflowering. Dammit, I am no wallflower, but when someone outshines me in a social situation, I have absolutely NO idea what to do. It doesn't happen often. 

It was around 10pm when we left, as he had to pick up his brother, and it was past my bedtime. It was awkward when we parted ways, there was some weird cheek/lips kiss in his car, and that was that. 

Haven't heard from him since. 

I was not going to write this until today, Tuesday, as I gave him the benefit of the doubt of not texting since his was in Florida until Monday, and if he did end up texting me, there could have been more to this story. I mean he was in Florida at a family wedding, and he loves hanging out with his brothers who are also his best friends... I guess things got wild. I have no clue. BUT I do have a clue that he did not text me, thus I am again, going to be a spintzer for life. I guess I should start collecting cats (real life ones and figurines). What a shame.

Eff you TCB. I hope the movie Hostel becomes your life story in June.